Being stripped

It became harder and harder to look at myself in the mirror and recognize anything I liked in the reflection before me.

Today I realize that I was being stripped. Stripped of loved ones, sense of security, my dignity, and so much more. Then came the point when I was stripped of a place to lay my head at night.

Unforeseen circumstances “forced” friend/roommates to break our lease. They had their backup set up but I, well I had to figure it out. This lead to being stripped of that friendship, the last from the place I escaped. In hindsight, it was a dysfunctional friendship anyhow.

What a feeling that was. No mom, no family around, no friends, no home.  The feeling of betrayal, embedding itself deep beneath my inner skin, coursed through me with every breath. The tides had to turn and soon before I could no longer recognize myself completely. My circumstances felt too powerful for me to handle. The me I was becoming could not be the me I was intended to be. But I still refused to return to the home I once knew. That home had been dismantled completely and I was in no position to put it back together. The person I was, couldn’t.

Psalm 51:17 The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit; a broken and contrite heart, O God, you will not despise.

…These days I willingly sacrifice my brokenness to Him.

…These days I am oh so grateful to know He sees the me He knows me to be and not the reflection of what I had once been.

…These days I am learning to see the me He sees.

 

 

 

Author: piecesofgoretty

My name is Goretty Gordon, also known as the mom from The Jamaitians on YouTube. I wear so many hats, that of a wife, a mom of now 4, a writer and more. As full as my life is I haven't always been present in it. In fact, the posts in this blog express my desire and PURSUIT OF PEACE in my life, a task in itself so difficult made much harder after the MURDER of my mother back in 2001. WRITING has become instrumental in my FINDING PEACE along with other things such as ACCEPTANCE in who I am truly, whatever that may be at any given moment. Many things have transpired in my life since the start of this blog and I can only hope that my turmoil, heartaches and grievances that I've conquered and those that I continue to work through will benefit someone in getting through their own pains.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s