The me that was

Once you’ve gone through certain shocks of life and find yourself engulfed in a domino effect of gut wrenching events that play on every emotion past and present, you tend to focus on that particular person you are then, in that moment.

Today, today I remember my true minnie me. The me before my eyes were opened to this lifes disappointments, betrayals, and chaos. The me that was innocent until she wasn’t but was young enough to remove the unsavory memory…until she wasn’t. The me that laughed, played, loved without conditions. The me that had been closest to Jesus out of all the me’s I would be, in my opinion anyway.

That me. I love her. I have hated her. I’ve learned from her. She hid from some of my lessons. Rightfully so. Who wants to learn when there’s Sesame Street and strawberry ice cream. Which the me now rather not have in my choice of desserts. Just a fun fact.

Back to her.

That me took some hits in her lifetime, as well I should say. Hits she was able to suppress. Hits that scared her at night. Hits that made her ponder about many things, most of which came from an innocent inquisitive place. Hits that eventually forced her to hide deep within. She even experienced hits that, looking back now, this me, am so grateful for having been one in which Jesus turned back for.

The enemy had and still has his own plans for me. That, well she learned that fact too. But she, she was so bright. She shared some of that brightness with me, this me. She was so fierce…in the beginning. Not this mask of strength and authority. She, she knew Jesus on a whole other level. He loved, loves, love her so. He granted her flying rights. She soar most nights.

As I write this I feel His presence and I’m flooded with the exact love and emotional tie between them. He actually….She flew. I flew. I fly again. What a connection they had and I now possess, that minnie me and He.

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Like I said I am grateful. She probably would have a better more colorful word. Hahaha.

But I am. Just so grateful he returned for me…this me that was once she. He loved me then, through, and even now.

You too. He loves you too. Oh so much.

Author: piecesofgoretty

My name is Goretty Gordon, also known as the mom from The Jamaitians on YouTube. I wear so many hats, that of a wife, a mom of now 4, a writer and more. As full as my life is I haven't always been present in it. In fact, the posts in this blog express my desire and PURSUIT OF PEACE in my life, a task in itself so difficult made much harder after the MURDER of my mother back in 2001. WRITING has become instrumental in my FINDING PEACE along with other things such as ACCEPTANCE in who I am truly, whatever that may be at any given moment. Many things have transpired in my life since the start of this blog and I can only hope that my turmoil, heartaches and grievances that I've conquered and those that I continue to work through will benefit someone in getting through their own pains.

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